That would be a pretty normal response. But... Have you engaged in any behavioral modification?Adam wrote:
I would bristle with anger but leave him alone. If he gets out of his car and starts yelling insults at me, i would yell insults back.
EDIT:
If he stays in his car i would be on my way. If he gets off, but has not guns i would have nothing to worry about, he is handicapped, no reason to use fists. Im rather passifistic anyway.
I liken responses like that to putting pheremone-laiden Japanese Beetle traps in your yard in the summer. You will attract and kill literally hundreds of Japanese Beetles, and I suppose that makes you feel pretty good. Meanwhile for every bug that goes in the trap, there are quite a few females not interested in the female scent and just enough males making it on your property and not going in the bag. They will do the nasty, eat your greens, and then leave their progeny in the ground for you to deal with next summer. Then you have a worse problem the following year.
But you feel really good killing all those beetles, right?
How about a different approach? If you want to show what kind of man you are and how much courage you have, why not offer to help this disabled vet get his groceries in his vehicle? Ask him about his tour of duty. Listen! If this man went off to war, he has some REAL martial stories to tell. Ask him if he wants to share some of that over a cup of coffee at Starbucks - your treat. Don't tell him you are Muslim. Just get to know him and show him a good human being.
I'm willing to bet that this gentleman is suffering from PTSD. Been to combat? It comes with the territory. We martial artists should have some sympathy, if not empathy.
From 1977 through 1992 I was in an apartment in Charlottesville. It was owned by an old Greek couple. About once every month or two, they'd get on the phone and rail against their tenants about something. Most of the tenants hated them. I soon learned the truth - they were desperately lonely. I'd acknowledge the concern, and then stay on the phone with them for at least an hour talking about anything that came to mind. I'd go pay them visits every few months. I'd trim their bushes, shovel the snow off the walks, and even plant some summer gardens that would make them brag to their neighbors. We developed a fabulous relationship, and I gained from that. And I think I made the sunset of their lives just a little bit better.
I'm betting this man could use a friend. Imagine you, Adam, destroying all his preconceived notions about "Arabs" and "Muslims." Imagine making the world a better place - one person at a time.
Some people don't deserve that kindness. But I sense this man needs it, and has earned it. I could be wrong... But is it braver to get in his face, or disarm him by being the friend he never knew he could have? Could you actually kill him with kindness?
Have you ever gone up to a screaming, threatening person, and just stood calmly and peacefully within striking distance? If it's just a barking dog looking for a chase, it freaks them out. Who is controlling whom?
Just a wild thought...
- Bill