Anna

[Van Canna]

Finally Anna’s closed eyes reopen looking up towards a blue sky furrowed by intense colors in a lukewarm afternoon of end of summer.

In that moment Anna understands she is still around, she did not totally give up, and she is still alive.

Her heart reacts strongly to the lights. Echoes of distinct knells in her chest toll a knowledge of strength of encouragement to start over again.

Anna turns her head some and her splendid green eyes fall upon familiar faces she recognizes notwithstanding the time she has been away, very far, in another life, Or…. Death?

Anna had left them to go to sleep one fine afternoon, similar to today, the sky was blue and furrowed by intense colors and lights.

Anyway, they were all there, for her, even if they didn’t know that Anna had never forgotten them, she had brought them with her, within, cradled, rocked, and loved as her sweet love for Marco.

Now they were out of limbo and were smiling at her with a new strength, vigor, for the newfound joy.

They were all there, whispering sweet words, caressing her face, every so often a kiss brushing her cheeks. They were all there…except her Marco.

“ Anna, how are you? Thanks to God you are still here! We have prepared such a lovely room for you at home, you will see, you will love it.”

“Anna, if you only knew how we prayed all this time, and we were barely religious up until now. “

Anna listens to the words, her senses capture the laughter, but her eyes continue to be veiled in her implacable sadness.

She desired the soothing caressing voice of Marco, of once again seeing his amiable smile; she wanted him to appear suddenly in the room, as he used to do from time to time in jest.

Why did he not leave her mind as the others she had known?

“ Anna” did you hear your father? He promised to cook everyday for all of us if you came back to us, and he can barely cook.

Anna tries to follow their conversations, but she is unable to, rather, she doesn’t want to. Suddenly all she wants is to go back to sleep, this time not to ever awaken again.

Maybe it is a joke of Marco, she reflects. Now I shall close my eyes and when I reopen them, my Marco will be really here next to me.

A slight uncertainty infuses her with hope.

Anna again closes her eyes, all around her the voices continue incessantly.
“
Anna, my God, Anna, what are you doing?”
Her mother shakes her arm and Anna reopens her eyes. The faces are still there, maybe a bit more concerned, but Marco is nowhere in sight.

“Anna, my treasure,my love, don’t play these tricks on me, never do this again, you hear your mother?”

Suddenly the room atmosphere is very heavy, no one dares to speak anymore, the faces become sad, melancholy, and the looks are distant and aimless.

It is again night, and the night will follow day this way forever, for all life and beyond.

Anna is alone again, and she listens the beat of her heart that whispers to her, softly, the sweet memories of her Marco.

So much darkness, so much yearning, her eyes closing again.











[This message has been edited by Van Canna (edited September 21, 2000).]